me? let it go? no way!

I talked Ms. Blue car into helping me out.  Her last day is tomorrow, so as soon as I suggested it you could see the gears turning and a big grin spread across her face.  I guided her into the spot just an inch from his bumper.  I moved my car to block the back end.

We stood back and admired at our handywork.  It didn't feel complete yet.

So I went to my desk where Ben was sitting.  "Did you do it?"   I assured him revenge was at hand. It needed to be more involved.  It had to be more diabolical.

Both Smitty and Vagina came to my aid.  We accomplished the task just in time for the boss to be walking out the door and on the way to the airport.

He pointed at one of us after the other "Your fired! Your Fired and Your Fired!!"  We all broke out laughing.  We get fired once or twice a week.

Everyone moved their cars but me.  The boss jumped in his massive SUV and pointed at me.  I walked up to his window and said, "Don't f*ck with my spot. :P"  Yes, I even stuck my tongue out.

With that, he threw the SUV into reverse, squealed the tires and almost hit my car.  "Hear that?... I think I heard your puny car scream!"

And then he sped out of the lot.

I'm younger and have less insurance.

Why my boss needed to take my parking spot this morning is beyond me.  I was tempted to pull a fried green tomatoes move on him and ram his car.

I thought about trying to park him in, but that didn't seem possible unless I got Ms. Blue car to help out too.

*grumble!!*

mmm...chicken

I just had a nice hearty belch and it tasted exactly like fried chicken from KFC.

Just thought everyone should know.

and no... I haven't had KFC.

Hopefully you won't find this offensive.

So Becky stops me this morning while I'm wandering around the office drinking my coffee.  She told me they had a general meeting this morning.  I believe I got to work right when it was ending.

Becky: "Hopefully you won't find this offensive, but it got everyone in the meeting laughing so hard."
Daniel: "Oh?"
Becky: "[CEO] made a comment how our office is one big reality show.  They should put cameras up."
Daniel: "I could see that... we are quite a strange office."
Becky: "[VP] made a comment that he'd be fired if they saw how much pr0n he watches."  ... "Then I had to say how I'd be right with him because he sends me everything."
Daniel: "Yeah I have a feeling most people would end up being fired.."
Becky: "Then.. [CEO] pipes in and says how Daniel would have to have his own side show called the 'Ass Packer'."

I wasn't offended at all, I started laughing as well. I couldn't believe that had come out of his mouth!! She even jotted notes about it and showed them to me so she wouldn't forget what he had said.  Just to get him back for that one I'm going to make up a shirt with "ASS PACKER" printed across the front of it.  We'll see how long it takes him to catch on and yell at me to turn it inside out or go change.  heh.

What? huh? what'd you say?

So I had an awesome weekend.  The Canadian crew came down for the weekend and I had so much fun.  It was nice having a bunch of people around to do brunches and random things with.

Saturday, we hit brunch, then the Simpson's movie at the Cinerama, threw an impromptu barbeque and hung out all night.

Sunday was brunch again at the skylark, a nap and then hit the Daft Punk concert all night.  It was my first concert and was totally worth it.  The music was awesome and the light show spectacular.  I wasn't feeling well at first (i think my blood sugar was too high) but after a bit of chilling out in the seats I was out in the crowd "dancing" (or something that vaguely resembles dancing) all night.  I've never sweat so much in my life.  Even a 2 hour workout at the gym wouldn't get me to do that!

Today, I am slightly kicking myself.  Stupid me decided he didn't need earplugs and could dance right in front of the array of speakers all night.  Being hard of hearing already it seemed fine at the time, now my ears are ringing and I'm constantly saying "What?" or "huh?".  Everyone at work knew I was going so they just giggled when I said I wasn't hearing well this morning.

Today, I'm exhausted.  But, on the positive side, it was the first weekend in a long time that actually felt like a whole weekend.  Usually on Monday I'm telling my coworkers that it felt too short.

Things are changing here at work, but more on that later this week.

doh!

hah... I made my own Simpson's character.

moola.com

I know I ran out of invites last time I posted this, so if anyone still wanted to play on moola...

Click me to join!

boss' b-day

I walked in and saw a cake in the kitchen.  When I got to my desk there was a birthday card for the CEO.

I hate signing cards.  I can't ever think of anything to put in it.

My first thought was "Fuck you... and happy birthday."  But Crunchy behooved me not to write that.

I mulled it over for a few minutes and finally settled on "Enjoy the latter years of your life." or something like that.

I hate birthdays.

I could bitch again about how everyone always gets a card and cake except me.  But I won't.  I totally won't bring it up.

I totally didn't get a card though.

No friggin' cake either.

:P

still working hard

So I told my coworkers what I did after I posted yesterday.  They were shocked, but were pretty sure I wouldn't get fired.  I wasn't so sure.  I told them i was taking the 35 minute bet.  Every few minutes I'd speak up to the group and say, "17 more minutes....  14 more minutes guys....  oh no, 8 more."   35 minutes came and went.

I was told by one person that he's been known to respect people who actually speak up like that... so I may not be in any trouble at all.

He's come in my office a few times with a cheerful demeanor and hasn't said anything.

So... I'm still here, still working hard like usual.

Taking bets?

I got out of a meeting with my ceo, vp, and a 3rd party we work with very closely.  My CEO and the CEO of that 3rd party were standing there chatting about the "dream team."  This new team of programmers he's hired that are working off site that my boss is convinced is the best out there.  Which, in return, has made my team feel insignificant and angered.

So...I walked out and heard him say "dream team" and totally snapped.

Me: "Fuck you and the fucking dream team.  What the hell is that about?!"

Now, I've always said I speak my mind at all times.  Why, God, why didn't you give me the ability to shut up now and then?  Ok, he probably did, but I seem to keep forgetting that part.

Boss: "Well did you install the software?"

Not knowing what he was talking about other than the fact it was about this damned "dream team" i said, "Well, probably not."

Boss: "Well then fuck you."

Care to wager how long until he comes upstairs and fires me?  Not that I feel bad for what I said, it's what most people are thinking and have expressed on the side.  I just could've been a lot more tactful and said it in private.

my random negative thoughts of unease.

OMG this day will just not end.

Waiting on some possible big news isn't helping either.

And the fact that the tech team went and gorged at pizza buffet for lunch and now we all need naps isn't helping either.

I feel like a whale.

My boss' need to organize their emergencies better (seeing as everything is an emergency).

I want to go home but chances are I'll work late.  I even came in early today.

I wish it was Friday.

My muscles hurt from going to the gym last night for the first time in weeks.

I've had to sh*t my ass all day but haven't managed to get to the bathroom yet.

I've accomplished only 1 minor task so far today.

I think I come off as an snobby princess to my boss' since I'm not afraid of them and speak my mind. 

I need to find a hobby/activity that excites me again.  I'm stuck in a rut of boredom.

I'm not very happy with life in general.

New car decal

not the best pictures, but you can still see it.  probably more decals to come :)

in one swoop

I just got a slap on the back from the boss.  In one quick swoop, I've managed to add a feature to our main website that increased profits by 5%.  It's not even an advertised feature yet!  I'm curious what the number will look like once I advertise it to customers.

whee!

hdr again

got away from my desk for a bit at work and captured this outside looking over the building.  just thought i'd share.

omg i'm hooked

OMG, I'm hooked on another site.

check out moola.  it's based on the old concept of doubling a penny 30 times.  basically your matched up with other users at your same level, play a simple game and whoever wins gets the other persons money.  lose, and your set back to 1 penny.  you can cash out once you hit $10, and it's all free.  only catch is you have to watch a short ad before a game and then answer a question to make sure you watched it.  very simple and you can skip it once you realize what the ad is about.

it's done by referral right now, so use this link to get in if your interested.

http://www.moola.com:80/moopubs/b2b/exc/join.jsp?sid=4d5449744e6a517a4d546b3d-2

People know..

Ok, People around this office know Daniel cannot handle the frosted cookies.  I can't...i just can't.  They are my kryptonite.

I walked into the kitchen and saw aquatic shaped cookies for the taking.  After questioning someone I found out it was the CEO who put them there.

I looked.

I sniffed.

I arranged them.

I took a picture of one of them, but I won't eat one.  Look at that sugar coating!  It's a diabetic nightmare.

What I wouldn't give to eat one.

So I have determined my boss is trying to kill me.  I don't know where he is at the moment but he's lucky I couldn't find him.  I totally would have chucked this seahorse at his head.

Randy

I had a conference where I got to schmooze with all the company investors and stockholders.  One major investor in particular gave me the "there is no can't" speech.  I took some of his advice and approached my CEO this morning when I walked in.

Me: Hey boss!
CEO: Hey stud.
Me: You look really nice today?

He checked himself out for a second to see if it was true

Me: So I've put a lot of thought into it and...
CEO: What's that?
Me: I would be a LOT more productive if I had an iphone.  It's something I feel I need and the company can either give me one today or one on Monday.

He just started laughing at me.

Me: "Can I have Jerry's email?  I'll have to tell him that didn't work."

He just laughed harder at me and started cursing Jerry's name.

celebrating becky's latest visit to the doctor

surveys

If anyone is interested in doing online surveys, try this one.  I just finished a couple $15 surveys, and I've had several $75 ones in the past.

On to the surveys...

I know I posted this like a year ago, but this is the one and only site I actually get money out of.  The other sites I've tried give you points and it takes ungodly amounts of points to get anything from them.

i'm melting!

omg, 8pm and it's still 93° out.   this is so not right.  make it cold out again *pout*

new favorite shot

Spent the weekend up in Vancouver, BC.  I was asked to take photos and had so many photo opportunities... it was awesome!  I walked away with plenty of gems.  Here's one of my new favorite shots taken so far. 

It's the skateboard park, aka the bowl, where I took photos of people boarding and biking.  I was lucky enough to take an HDR photo without anyone jumping, rolling or (insert board/biking terms here) into my frame.

alone... again

I walked out of my office a few minutes to find the office completely empty.  I work every night alone, but it wasn't even 4:45.  The office is open until at least 5:30 and then I'm here until 8 or 9.

What the hell, people?

I know it's Friday and all, but this is a little much.  The whole office?  really?  Was there a memo I missed?

And I thought I slacked sometimes.

starting to think

I'm starting to think Blackie Chan poses for the camera.

love

You know what I love?  Washing my car and then later finding it full of dust and dirt. 

And to top it off... a giant blob of runny white bird crap as big as life on the hood.

just cuz

iphone

Maybe it is my current state of bitterness, but I am so sick of hearing about the damn iphone.  Whenever the next big thing to have comes out, it ticks me off.  For months all I've heard is iphone this, iphone that.  Seriously, it's a just new gadget you'll pay out the nose for. 

$500-600, plus $60-120 service plans?  No Spank-you!

Granted, if someone handed me a free one, I'd definitely keep it.  I'm hypocritical like that.

But if anyone comes up to show me their damn iphone they will most likely receive the spazzfest of a lifetime in return.

here fishy fishy...

Even the smiling goldfish in my soup are agitating me today.

They just giggled

I walked in 3 hours before my shift today for a company meeting.  I'm dead tired and am pissy because they keep scheduling meetings when they know I don't have office hours.

I passed the executive secretary and she said "Daniel..." and just started laughing.

I glared at her knowing exactly what she was going to say. "What!  It better not be canceled."  My boss is known for doing that all the time.  He'll schedule an important meeting and then just not show up to his own damn meeting.

"Rescheduled until next week," she said.

"I really @#$%!!@ hate you guys. I really do.  I own a cell phone you know.  It works.  It does, I checked it this morning." 

I stormed towards the exit.  "BYE." I wanted go find something to do for 3 hours but I hear the CEO calling my name "Daniel...DANIEL.....DANIEL!  come back here."

I walked into his office where an iphone is sitting there in it's box.  "That better be for me." and he laughed and said he was checking it out but wasn't sure if he was keeping it.  I wasn't laughing.

All this laughing was pissing me off more.  We had a short conversation since he could probably tell how royally angry I was and he wasn't going to push it.